On my own brilliance as a comedian

Everyone says I am brilliant. How brilliant, you ask? Well, as I have said repeatedly throughout the annals of my stupendiferous blog, "The Musings of Robert Robus"--the very blog which you happen to be perusing at this instant--I am the greatest cybercomedian ever to walk the face of the earth. There has never been a cybercomedian like I, Robert Robus, and there will never be another cybercomedian as fine as I for the rest of the course of human history.

The casual observer may object that this is rather grandiose talk coming from someone such as I. After all, I have only been maintaining this magnificent blog for a year and a half, and have as yet attained a popularity which is but semisoaring at best. And yet I, Robert Robus, assure you that everything I have said with regard to yours truly is absolutely veracious, and will stand the test of weathered time, with a firmness that can only be said to be shared by Roman columns.

But what are the costs, one might ask, of being so assured as I, Robert Robus? Well, for one, when one is completely, utterly and unequivocally convinced of one's own greatness--and furthermore of the unstinting veracity of one's views--one cannot help notice that one's truthful pontifications scare away many a potential companion--most often for the reason that said potential companion, when his opinions conflict with those of I (and are therefore, ipso facto, completely and irredeemably false), there seems to ensue almost invariably an irreconcilable argument. (In fact, my good sir, that man you saw me defenestrate from my sixth-floor study not two hours past seems to have caused such a situation.)

But, no matter: I, Robert Robus, am a great man, with accurate opinions, a penchant for high-flown speech, and a spectacular comedic sweep. Thus, I count myself by far the best cybercomedian conceivable; and people who can't see the truth be damned!